Time for more random stuff from my brain! Yay! I said YAY.
Has there ever been the alterna-Flinstones? Like has there ever been the hot guy/ fat chick sitcom? Because, on the real Wilma Flintstone, Alice Kramden, Carrie Heffernan could have done waaaaay better. Confession: I think Kevin James is kinda hot. But it works against the formula because I’m also fat. So we’d be another Mike and Molly.
Why do all the shows when someone gets a house/cash/gifts/cash happen to everyone else? Where is the application for these shows? Why don’t I know about it? Is it a conspiracy to keep me poor? I think it is. But then, I’m pretty sure life is a conspiracy to keep me poor.
Why does Naomi Campbell still look better than me? Aside from the fact that she probably diets, exercises, and great genes. Oh, and a stylists. Not the point. The point is, I thought time was supposed to be the great equalizer. You lied, Time. YOU. LIED.
There’s this fly on the windowsill. I need to go kill—never mind it’s a wasp. Carry on, wasp, I clearly interrupted whatever you had going on with the window and I apologize.
I walk at the track to lose weight. (Not to be confused with “walking the track” which means prostitution. In which case I’d like to think that I’d have more money. ) Today a more athletic chick ran past me and told me “Good Job!” I guess I’m at the white belt level of fitness and the track is clearly her dojo, she figured I needed her encouragement so that I wouldn’t give up and pass out on the track. I showed her though. I waited until I got to Gretchen to pass out.
The wasp is still there.
I know the entire Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles song. All of them. And I sang them with Kid Sensation in Fred Meyer. Quietly. I’m not a complete jerk.
I have convinced myself to get a fatkini. It’s. About. To Go. DOWN.
We are so football starved in this house, we are watching the Madden Demo Game. It’s Cowboys vs. Seahawks. And we are here commenting on it. I actually said, “Oh, so they just gon’ let Romo walk in the end zone?” Out loud. Pathetic.
I don’t know. I was feeling random today. Kick me some of your randomness. You know, if you’re feeling random, too.
OH WAIT!!! I forgot to tell you guys! I was buying wine and I got carded. (I’m pretty sure it’s mandatory.) Here’s how the conversation went:
Cashier Lady: “You have such pretty skin.”
CL: “Black Women are so lucky. You’re lucky you’re Black.”
Me: *mumbles something and rushes out before ending up on the news*
So, you guys, did I handle this right? Supermom would have totally had some kind of extremely nuanced shade and tossed it out there like a wiffle ball. But, I’m no Supermom. Yet.